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Never Say Never ... Again ...

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bvince
Posted 2006-12-17 4:01 PM (#322006)
Subject: Never Say Never ... Again ...



Joined:
September 2005
Posts: 3623

Location: GATLINBURG TENNESSEE :)
Well, as fate has it I have come to a dilemma. My daughter has just announced her engagement, and it appears she is intent on having the reception at a place with a starting, out-the-door cost of $6,000. Of course, if I suggest anything cheaper, I am the "bad Guy" with everyone. So .... Although I will only have to pay half, I am finding it necessary to part with one of my Elites.

The big question is which one?? I love them both, and they both have their unique qualities. On the one hand, the 1537 is rare and would be hard to ever replace. Of course the cedar topped cutaway is also hard to find, I like both of them but one has got to go. Any (legitimate) suggestions or comments out there to help with this decision?
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gh1
Posted 2006-12-17 4:06 PM (#322007 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
April 2006
Posts: 972

Location: PDX
Which one do you reach for first? Keep that one.

_____
gh1
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Jeff W.
Posted 2006-12-17 4:14 PM (#322008 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
November 2003
Posts: 11039

Location: Earth·SolarSystem·LocalInterstellarCloud·Local Bub
go with the one you play most. Send the other to the adoption agency...
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Waskel
Posted 2006-12-17 4:15 PM (#322009 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...



Joined:
February 2005
Posts: 11840

Location: closely held secret
Keep both guitars - and ask your daughter how she intends to pay for such an extravagant wedding.
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Trader Jim
Posted 2006-12-17 4:32 PM (#322010 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
June 2006
Posts: 7307

Location: South of most, North of few
Find something elst to pawn, not the guitars...
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MWoody
Posted 2006-12-17 7:13 PM (#322011 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...



Joined:
December 2003
Posts: 13997

Location: Upper Left USA
Long engagements can be a good thing! As I've heard, abstinence makes the heart grow fonder... my first Wife used to practice obstinance...

Don't sell any instruments. Look for some other short term revenue or things to get rid of to cut costs.
The old Ebay Garage Sale or quit smoking/drinking/lattes/lotto tickets/cable TV.
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stephent28
Posted 2006-12-17 7:22 PM (#322012 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...



Joined:
April 2004
Posts: 13303

Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066
If I win the lotto or powerball within the next couple weeks, I will pay the $6000!
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stonebobbo
Posted 2006-12-17 8:16 PM (#322013 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...



Joined:
August 2002
Posts: 8307

Location: Tennessee
Congratulations!! As someone who just went through a daugter's wedding, the most important thing is the make it right for the Bride (and her Mother!). If all goes according to plan, it is a once-in-a-lifetime event. Guitars come and guitars go ... your daughter is forever. As far as which guitar, I see 1537s for sale fairly regularly, but not deep bowl cutaway cedar Elites. I would be tempted to keep the cedar.

And how did you get away with only having to pay half? :)
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Mark in Boise
Posted 2006-12-17 8:21 PM (#322014 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
March 2005
Posts: 12762

Location: Boise, Idaho
A friend of ours spent $80,000 on his 2 daughters' weddings. They both got married the same summer. That was crazy. About a year later he was laid off. We spoil our kids too much.
Keep the guitars. Play her a song at her wedding. She'll remember that much more than she'll remember the reception.
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Mr. Ovation
Posted 2006-12-17 8:33 PM (#322015 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
December 2001
Posts: 7247

Location: The Great Pacific Northwest
Originally posted by The Wabbit Formerly Known As Waskel:
Keep both guitars - and ask your daughter how she intends to pay for such an extravagant wedding.
Ditto, or give a few bucks to the Son-in-Law-to-be and tell him to elope.
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Old Man Arthur
Posted 2006-12-17 9:58 PM (#322016 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...



Joined:
September 2006
Posts: 10777

Location: Keepin' It Weird in Portland, OR
Keep the guitars, and save money on entertainment by playing yourself, with some friends.
OR tell her about the Graceland Chapel, in Vegas. You can get a real nice wedding, with Elvis, for less than $1,000! I went there with a coupla Rubber Tramps [hobo's with a car]. They got married there for $75, including the ring... but no Elvis.
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stephent28
Posted 2006-12-17 11:39 PM (#322017 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...



Joined:
April 2004
Posts: 13303

Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066
Once again, on a forum full of clowns (including me), Stonebobbo speaks the only true words of wisdom.
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brainslag
Posted 2006-12-18 10:37 AM (#322018 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
April 2006
Posts: 1138

Location: CT
Sorry stephent28, I'm in the boat with Waskel. I may be a clown, but I'm not rich and hate when people expect me to pay more than I can afford for things.

When I got married, we were all strapped. Me, my bride to be and both sets of parents. We made do with a lovely reception, without the open bar and 6 course dinner, live band etc. A lot of friends chipped in with decorations, food and even the cake. We also had over 300 guests, and a good time was had by all. I don't think it would have been any more memorable if our parents went into hock for us for something that shouldn't be about extravigance. A lot of well to do friends of ours had the 100k. wedding and are divorced now. Are thier memories of an expensive reception, or the broken marriage?

We are still happy, and still cash strapped 17 yrs. later with 2 daughters approaching college age, followed shortly by marriage age, and I'm getting ulcers wondering where I'm going to get money to pay for any of that. What will you get for your Elite? 800.00 on ebay maybe, and regrets for years to come. Keep the guitars, and sit your daughter down for a chat, and maybe you can find a solution in the middle ground.
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moody, p.i.
Posted 2006-12-18 10:56 AM (#322019 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 15686

Location: SoCal
It's silly for kids to expect parents to pay more than they can afford for "things". I've got a friend who spent $40k on a wedding for his daughter 3 years ago. The daughter is now divorced.

And brainslag, I too hate it when people expect me to pay more for something than I can afford. I keep offering the Lexus dealer $1000 for a new LS 430 and they want me to pay more! They are not nice people!
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brainslag
Posted 2006-12-18 11:06 AM (#322020 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
April 2006
Posts: 1138

Location: CT
If you honestly thought you'd get the Lexus for $1000.00, you should sit with the clowns stephent28 was referring to.

(post edited so as not to ruffle feathers)

My point is, you can't HAVE a Lexus for 1000.00, so don't expect it. But you can drive a car that costs less. I wish I had a Lexus, but I do have a car that works (for now), so that is enough for me.

You can also have a wedding reception for less than 6k if you need one (see post above).

Some of us are on tight budgets, and it is hard for some well to do people to relate. It can be tough when your child comes home from a friends house and asks why we don't live in a huge house like that, or why don't we drive the Land Rover or Mercedes SUV etc. etc.

If you're cracking a joke on the Lexus, my guess is you've never encountered this, and I was just trying to give a little helpful input to someone who I can relate to.
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moody, p.i.
Posted 2006-12-18 11:33 AM (#322021 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 15686

Location: SoCal
Brainslag, I live in south Orange County CA where a 6 figure income qualifies you for lower middle class. I drive an 11 year old Toyota, a 23 year old Rx-7, and my wife drives the nice car, a 6 year old Lexus IS300 (w/ 100k miles). People around me have Mercedes, BMW's, boats and motorhomes. My kids hang out with people who have homes twice the size of ours. I know exactly what your point was as I live the same life style that you do (except that according to the people who learn what I do for a living, I obviously lead a very exciting and glamerous life).

I just like to annoy Lexus dealers (and occassionally people on the board). Lighten up. Grab your Legend 12 and come on over and we'll jam for a while. Got a small family room that's perfect for it.....
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brainslag
Posted 2006-12-18 11:42 AM (#322022 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
April 2006
Posts: 1138

Location: CT
That's perfect. We'll play a blues diddy about our ailing cars.
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moody, p.i.
Posted 2006-12-18 11:46 AM (#322023 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 15686

Location: SoCal
I'm sorry... you think I was complaining? I'm not crazy enough to be spending major money on a new car every 3 years. Get's in the way of buying new guitars...... We'll play something up beat about how smart we are!
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brainslag
Posted 2006-12-18 11:55 AM (#322024 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
April 2006
Posts: 1138

Location: CT
Oh, and don't tell me you have a boring job either. I used to watch The Rockford Files and Magnum P.I. I know all about it. :D
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fillhixx
Posted 2006-12-18 1:08 PM (#322025 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...



Joined:
November 2005
Posts: 4833

Location: Campbell River, British Columbia
Plan B: Explain to your daughter that her mother was pregnant when you met, it's time to go find your real father and get HIM to pay for the expensive wedding!

Someone close to me dropped 10Gs on a wedding that lasted 6 years, $1,666 a year is a pretty expensive way to get a kid out of the house.

Sorry, that's the perspective of someone who has lived in 'sin' and love for almost 30 years.
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Jason_S
Posted 2006-12-18 2:29 PM (#322026 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
August 2006
Posts: 2804

Location: ranson,wva
i was 17yrs old when i met my first wife, got married a year latter, i had a good job, we moved in together,decided that it was time. she wanted a big expensive wedding. no big deal,i had plenty of money. i paid 6 or 7k for the wedding. her faimly wouldnt pay shit. to make a long story short it lasted 2yrs, when the money ran out so did she. i remarried 2yrs ago and we had a service just us and the kids with the priest...$100 including the dinner afterwards and that was that....i dont have no where near the money i had,the wedding was small but this time i am much happier....the moral of the story is....its not the cost of the wedding its about the love you have for your partner...jason
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bvince
Posted 2006-12-18 9:31 PM (#322027 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...



Joined:
September 2005
Posts: 3623

Location: GATLINBURG TENNESSEE :)
Thanks for all the good comments. I've done a lot of the talking thing, and she's going to pay for half the cost. But she still wants the "wedding to remember", and the wife is strongly supportive of her. I'm not financially well off, but most of my part can probably be covered from my tax return (I will be claiming her as a dependent, which will definitely help). I have plenty of guitars, and sacrificing one to help with a nice wedding is not a problem for me. As I said earlier ... the question is not whether I'll be selling, but which one? I have been thinking about the "which one do you reach for first?" question, and the answer is niether. I usually reach for the adamas first. The cedar top deep bowl cutaway is easier to play for some reason, but I still like the sound of the 1537 a lot also. I'll probably end up selling the 1537 though. I'm still gonna give it another week to think about.
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stephent28
Posted 2006-12-19 3:40 AM (#322028 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...



Joined:
April 2004
Posts: 13303

Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066
Brainslag,

Guess I should have used the quotation system. This is what Stoney said that I was referring to:


Guitars come and guitars go ... your daughter is forever


Rereading my post I see how I made it sound as though I was saying to spend the money even if it caused a financial burden ....so I can see why you responded as you did...

My wife and I of 32 years financed our own wedding and had approximately 6 bowls of peanuts at the after wedding gathering, the dinner before the wedding was catered in my mom's kitchen (and cooked by relatives) and we couldn't afford a honeymoon of more than the weekend at the local hotel.....but we do have some terrific pictures and fond memories.
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philmax
Posted 2006-12-19 9:58 AM (#322029 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
June 2006
Posts: 659

Location: Hiram, Georgia
Yeah, whats up with these Lexus dealers, don't they know 'tis the season to be givin'. They're mean in Georgia too.
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Mark in Boise
Posted 2006-12-19 2:50 PM (#322030 - in reply to #322006)
Subject: Re: Never Say Never ... Again ...


Joined:
March 2005
Posts: 12762

Location: Boise, Idaho
Some of our best memories are of being poor. Don't know that I'd want to go back again, but I don't think that anyone can beat a honeymoon driving cross country in a rusted out VW camper. We spent the first night in a cheap hotel in Des Moines. That was all we could afford. Nowadays we couldn't afford the gas.
My brother gave us new shocks for a wedding present and installed one of them wrong. I think he did it deliberately, because it had an awful squeak. You get the picture.
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