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RIP: My Mom

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   Forums Archive -> The Vault: 2008Message format
 
G8r
Posted 2008-12-03 4:35 PM (#8809)
Subject: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
November 2006
Posts: 3969

No, she wasn't a famous musician, although she did at one time have a small measure of that.

She passed away early this morning, peacefully, in her sleep. I felt the best way to honor her memory would be to tell her story to those whom I consider my extended family.

As a young woman in a small coastal fishing village in Cuba she was courted by my Dad, who would show up in full military dress, and they would sit (apart) on the veranda of my grandfather’s home, watched over by a "dueña" (chaperon) to prevent any hanky-panky. Often that dueña was her next elder sister (there were 6 girls and 2 boys in the family), who wound up marrying my Dads next elder brother after many double dates.

Before marriage she enjoyed modest renown as a live radio singer. The picture of her below is a publicity shot from that time. She had a beautiful voice, and I've always attributed my musical abilities - limited as they are - to her and her influence.

My parents were the archetypal immigrant family in America. Since my father stood 4th in line to inherit the family farmstead - which was eventually seized by the Communist government anyway - they chose to come here and chase their dreams.

You can imagine the struggles of moving to a vastly different culture, learning a new language, and raising a family. Dad eventually started his own business, achieving the American dream of working for himself, beholden to no one.

Mom, meanwhile, stayed home until I was of school age, caring for other children to bring in a few extra dollars. While we were by no measure wealthy we never wanted for anything. When I went off to college, Mom kept working menial jobs and sent me all her money, so that I could concentrate on my studies and not have to worry about a job.

The phrase “family values” gets tossed around far too much as an epithet, especially by self-serving politicians who are later found to be engaging in deviant and reprehensible behaviors. Mom and Dad lived real family values. Putting the health and happiness of their children, 5 grandkids, and 2 great-grandkids above their own needs and wants, quietly toiling and sacrificing with never a complaint, they taught by example what are the real family values.

Mom and dad were married for 57 years when he passed away 4 years ago. Through all those years, struggles and hardships Mom never lost her sense of humor, her zest for life or her smile, a smile that lit up a room and chased away the clouds. Soon after Dad's passing, Mom’s health started deteriorating, and we reluctantly had to place her in a nursing home for the last year and a half. She’d been barely conscious for the past 3 weeks, like a clock winding down, and though I don't think she recognized me near the end, her last glimmer of consciousness was a hint of a smile at hearing the voice and feeling the touch of her youngest grandson, my 2 year old. True to form.

Mom, thank you for showing me the value of honesty, commitment, perseverance, education and humor. Thank you for giving me perspective on what’s truly important in life. And most of all, thank you for the music.

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2ifbyC
Posted 2008-12-03 4:44 PM (#8810 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom
Joined:
December 2006
Posts: 6268

Location: Florida Central Gulf Coast
Serge,

What a wonderful and beautiful tribute!

Thank you for sharing your memories. You and yours will be in our thoughts and prayers!
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Auriemma
Posted 2008-12-03 4:45 PM (#8811 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom



Joined:
October 2008
Posts: 638

Location: NW of Philadelphia
My deepest condolences to you and yours.
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sligoman
Posted 2008-12-03 4:46 PM (#8812 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
October 2007
Posts: 283

Location: Portland, OR
Very nice tribute. I'm sure she's pleased.
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BT717
Posted 2008-12-03 4:47 PM (#8813 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
October 2007
Posts: 2711

Location: Vernon CT
G8r, My Deepest and most sincere Sympathy and condolences to you and your Family, Beautiful picture of your Mom. Thank-you for sharing this with us.
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lanaki
Posted 2008-12-03 4:48 PM (#8814 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
October 2006
Posts: 5575

Location: big island
what a beautiful saint she is, serge. and an awesomely warm tribute.
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OldLiverJones
Posted 2008-12-03 4:49 PM (#8815 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
October 2005
Posts: 803

Location: Avondale, AZ
I'm sorry to hear of your loss. g8r said "Mom, thank you for showing me the value of honesty, commitment, perseverance, education and humor. Thank you for giving me perspective on what’s truly important in life. And most of all, thank you for the music." She was a wonderful mother.
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schroeder
Posted 2008-12-03 4:50 PM (#8816 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
November 2004
Posts: 4413

The fact hat you could write that speaks volumes for her.
My condolences to you and your family.
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AussieJames
Posted 2008-12-03 4:50 PM (#8817 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom



Joined:
June 2007
Posts: 3084

Location: Brisbane Australia
Serge,

Thankyou for sharing

Sincere condolences from all Downunder

AJ
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Slipkid
Posted 2008-12-03 4:55 PM (#8818 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom



Joined:
September 2003
Posts: 9301

Location: south east Michigan
That is a wonderful story.
Thank you.
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cliff
Posted 2008-12-03 4:55 PM (#8819 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 14836

Location: NJ
WellDone, and MyCondolences for YourLoss.
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Tim in Yucaipa
Posted 2008-12-03 4:55 PM (#8820 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
August 2003
Posts: 2246

Location: Yucaipa, California
Thank you for including us Serge. My deepest condolences and well wishes. I've been there with both parents.

Beautiful tribute to a Beautiful Woman. Thank you.
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lanaki
Posted 2008-12-03 4:58 PM (#8821 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
October 2006
Posts: 5575

Location: big island
and you've got your mom's eyes.
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ProfessorBB
Posted 2008-12-03 4:58 PM (#8822 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom



Joined:
January 2006
Posts: 5859

Location: Colorado Rocky Mountains
A beautiful story in commemoration of a talented, caring and obviously beautiful person. You are blessed. Thanks for sharing it with us, Serge.
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CrimsonLake
Posted 2008-12-03 5:00 PM (#8823 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
August 2006
Posts: 3145

Location: Marlton, NJ
Serge - I'm so sorry to hear about your Mom. Our deepest sympathies go out to you and your family. That's a very beautiful story - thanks for sharing it with us.

Your Friend,

Mike
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Weaser P
Posted 2008-12-03 5:03 PM (#8824 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
October 2005
Posts: 5282

Location: Cicero, NY
So sorry for your loss, serge. And, just to echo what has been said, what a stunning memorial by a son. Thanks for sharing.
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moody, p.i.
Posted 2008-12-03 5:04 PM (#8825 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 15332

Location: SoCal
All our prayers, Serge.....
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an4340
Posted 2008-12-03 5:07 PM (#8826 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
May 2003
Posts: 4389

Location: Capital District, NY, USA Minor Outlying Islands
My condolences.
What a wonderful woman.
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dvd
Posted 2008-12-03 5:14 PM (#8827 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom



Joined:
December 2003
Posts: 1889

Location: Central Massachusetts
What a great tribute. She raised you right. Sorry for your loss.
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FlicKreno aka Solid Top
Posted 2008-12-03 5:15 PM (#8828 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
April 2006
Posts: 2491

Location: Copenhagen Denmark
My sincere condolences ,

A Wonderful and Beautyful Tribute indeed , Good thoughts are on the way to you and your family.

Vic
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Capo Guy
Posted 2008-12-03 5:17 PM (#8829 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom



Joined:
December 2004
Posts: 4394

Location: East Tennessee
Serge,

I'm very sorry to hear of your loss.

Thank You for sharing Her story. My prayers go out to you and your family.
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Jeff W.
Posted 2008-12-03 5:23 PM (#8830 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
November 2003
Posts: 11039

Location: Earth·SolarSystem·LocalInterstellarCloud·Local Bub
My Condolences, Serge.
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Gway
Posted 2008-12-03 5:26 PM (#8831 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
April 2007
Posts: 318

Location: Slightly northwest of Trader Jim
Serge,
I'm so sorry for your loss. I can only hope that her going peacefully is some measure of comfort to you and your family. Knowing you is somewhat like knowing what she must have been like.
GOD BLESS.
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Trader Jim
Posted 2008-12-03 5:29 PM (#8832 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
June 2006
Posts: 7307

Location: South of most, North of few
Serge, thank you for the heartwarming story, and please accept my condolences for your loss. We too will be praying for your family.
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Mark in Boise
Posted 2008-12-03 5:30 PM (#8833 - in reply to #8809)
Subject: Re: RIP: My Mom


Joined:
March 2005
Posts: 12660

Location: Boise, Idaho
Nothing more or better can be said. There's nothing like a Mom's love for her kids. For years I wanted to sing "Momma" by B.J. Thomas for my mother and it was one of the reasons I picked up the guitar after many years. Sing it for her, Serge.
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