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HEMORRIODS ARE KILLING ME
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Forums Archive -> The Vault: 2006 | Message format |
cruster |
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Joined: May 2004 Posts: 2850 Location: Midland, MI | Originally posted by tdeej: Tim, that reminds me of something my grandfather did once. He and my grandmother had this old, black poodle named Rudy. He was pretty advanced in years, the dog, with his fur having taken on a slightly greyish, charcoal hue. ...a tube of very thick, black moly-lith multipurpose grease... Rudy had developed a cyst or tumor or something on his right side, almost all the way back to his leg. Well, all the hair around it turned completely grey, then fell out completely. It was really strange to see this one bald patch on their dog. Well, one weekend, my folks took us up there and the dog looked different. My sister and I couldn't really figure out why, though. My dad took one look at him and said, "How did you get his fur to grow back? And why is it so black?" My grandfather, it turned out, was working out in his shop and the dog happened to come in to see what he was doing. Apparently, he (my grandfather) got the bright idea to spray some WD-40 on the dogs bald patch. Nobody really knows why, and I don't think he ever volunteered a justifcation for how he arrived at that decision. Anyway, one good soaking with WD-40 and a couple weeks later, he had this luxurious, silky jet-black fur where previously he had scaly, whitish-pink skin. I wasn't the only one who thought the growth had shrunk, either. The amazing thing was that it didn't seem to have affected the dog negatively at all. To the contrary, he seemed pretty spunky compared to his old self. The only thing that could have been considered strange was that Rudy, when he needed to urinate, would hoist both back legs in the air, balancing on his forepaws. When he was done, he'd take a couple of steps forward before dropping his rear paws to the ground. Somewhere, I'm sure, my parents still have pictures of that. Have you noticed any change in habits or behavior since you've started using the molylube? :D (The story of Rudy is true, every word of it) | ||
Northcountry |
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Joined: February 2004 Posts: 2487 | Old People! | ||
cliff |
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Joined: March 2002 Posts: 14842 Location: NJ | I'll take "Threads I Wished I'd Never Read" for $400, Alex . . . | ||
Weaser P |
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Joined: October 2005 Posts: 5330 Location: Cicero, NY | ...and I definitely do not want to poll the audience, Reg. | ||
Capo Guy |
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Joined: December 2004 Posts: 4394 Location: East Tennessee | This topic has replaced the "Nose Hair" thread as most popular. We truly have sunk to a new low. :D GWB, I do hope you're feeling better soon. | ||
CrimsonLake |
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Joined: August 2006 Posts: 3145 Location: Marlton, NJ | If someone starts a Chlamydia thread I'm outta here :( | ||
cruster |
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Joined: May 2004 Posts: 2850 Location: Midland, MI | Originally posted by Gospel Guitar Guy: Most popular? Hardly...heck, it doesn't even have llama pictures! Nowhere near as popular as the llama threads. :pThis topic has replaced the "Nose Hair" thread as most popular. We truly have sunk to a new low. :D GWB, I do hope you're feeling better soon. | ||
Trader Jim |
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Joined: June 2006 Posts: 7307 Location: South of most, North of few | "Anyway, one good soaking with WD-40 and a couple weeks later, he had this luxurious, silky jet-black fur where previously he had scaly, whitish-pink skin." OK, I'm soaking the top of my head in WD40 today. | ||
Jeff W. |
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Joined: November 2003 Posts: 11039 Location: Earth·SolarSystem·LocalInterstellarCloud·Local Bub | ya think WD40 might clear up a case of chlamydia? | ||
guitarwannabee |
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Joined: January 2006 Posts: 1478 Location: Michigan | Im starting to think that is is more than just a HEMI.,On my way to the Emergency room.Wish me luck.GWB | ||
Mark in Boise |
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Joined: March 2005 Posts: 12758 Location: Boise, Idaho | Jim, have you tried the WD40 and, if so, has it worked yet? I'm about to go out in the garage and figured I'd give my head a shot. Do they make WD40 with a lemon scent or something? And will I have trouble keeping my hat on? | ||
stonebobbo |
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Joined: August 2002 Posts: 8307 Location: Tennessee | Good luck GWB. I hope it's no worse than just a bad 'roid ... all joking aside. | ||
cholloway |
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Joined: March 2005 Posts: 2791 Location: Atlanta, GA. | jpcannon, Have you given any consideration how you might look with "luxurious, silky jet-black fur" on top of your head??? | ||
Trader Jim |
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Joined: June 2006 Posts: 7307 Location: South of most, North of few | Beleive me, it would be better than the barren spot thats there now. :eek: | ||
Trader Jim |
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Joined: June 2006 Posts: 7307 Location: South of most, North of few | Originally posted by Mark in Boise: Yes, and it leaves a nice shine. Looks kind of like a buffed peach. Jim, have you tried the WD40 and, if so, has it worked yet? Originally posted by Mark in Boise: And will I have trouble keeping my hat on? Not if you use my patented super glue retainer system. | ||
cruster |
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Joined: May 2004 Posts: 2850 Location: Midland, MI | Originally posted by guitarwannabee: Good luck GWB. I hope everything comes out OK.Im starting to think that is is more than just a HEMI.,On my way to the Emergency room.Wish me luck.GWB | ||
Trader Jim |
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Joined: June 2006 Posts: 7307 Location: South of most, North of few | GWB, on a serious note, hope your problem is resolved soon. We have fun with this, trying to releive the hurt, but I beleive I speak for all of us when I say we wish the best for you. Keep us posted. | ||
Jason_S |
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Joined: August 2006 Posts: 2804 Location: ranson,wva | gwb...its a real pain in the ass..no pun intended....hope you soon recover..jason | ||
tdeej |
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Joined: November 2004 Posts: 286 Location: North Idaho | Originally posted by Gospel Guitar Guy: shrinking assets is generally a lowering problem...This topic has replaced the "Nose Hair" thread as most popular. We truly have sunk to a new low. :D GWB, I do hope you're feeling better soon. | ||
guitarwannabee |
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Joined: January 2006 Posts: 1478 Location: Michigan | Thanks for all of the humor & wellwishing about my issue. I just got back from the hospital and found out that I do not have an angry Hemmoroid but I have PERI-ANAL-ABCESS on the inside of my ANUS.The doctor felt it was just a little to premature to lance it so it could drain so he is giving me heavy duty antibiodics along with Vicodin and some other painkiller.Im telling you I have never experianced pain down there this severe and I hope I never have to again.I am going to stay knocked out on Painkillers and sleeping pills for the next two or three days until this thing goes away. Thanks again for having a little fun with me on the subject , I guess it is some type of therepy talking about it. P.S. I have some Suppositories and a sightly used tube of some Proctosol-HC 2.5% Anal creame if anyone wants it N/C. The creame could really speed up the action on an old dryed out guitar neck .thanks for letting me be sick . GWB | ||
cliff |
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Joined: March 2002 Posts: 14842 Location: NJ | "PERI-ANAL-ABCESS" Great band name. | ||
stonebobbo |
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Joined: August 2002 Posts: 8307 Location: Tennessee | Originally posted by cliff: Lance and the ... "PERI-ANAL-ABCESS" Great band name. Go Punk Pop. | ||
Trader Jim |
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Joined: June 2006 Posts: 7307 Location: South of most, North of few | GWB, had one of those. I was going to suggest that, butt... (sorry), I'm not a doctor. I know what they're like. They just keep getting more and more and more.... well, you know what I mean. I don't know if they ever go away, butt, (sorry again) you learn to do when they flare up, so to speak, and they aren't so bad. Just something that comes with age I think.. | ||
cruster |
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Joined: May 2004 Posts: 2850 Location: Midland, MI | I used to work with this guy who told a joke and the punch line was "Everyone knows that abscess makes the fart go Honda." Not that you'd want to be the butt of anyone's joke. Glad to hear that you got it looked at and they gave you something for it. Hopefully, you'll be back to normal in no time. | ||
Slipkid |
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Joined: September 2003 Posts: 9301 Location: south east Michigan | cheeky. | ||
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