|
|
Joined:
May 2002
Posts: 3005
Location: Las Cruces, NM | More good stuff from you guys, and I appreciate it as my life is ruined by the fickle fate finger.
I am still here and alive, thanks to one of our members. just after I was thrown into the sock fission clothes dryer power source by the Roy Clark robot and my shorts were fissioned, I heard a loud PTUII!! and was ejected from the sock fission machine. It seems I had 2 Adamas guitar picks in my Wranglers which made me a part of the organization that was taking over the world as that was their secret ID although you needed 10 to Captain a chopper. I was ejected through the guitar scoop back to my house, where the trobles just began.
As I mentioned, my wife was gone for 2 weeks visiting her daughter. The sock fission machine also used panties and bras when socks were scarce. I was ejected with a load of those and my wife walked in just in time to catch me putting on my pants standing on a pile of used panties and bras, no shorts or socks in sight, and an expression on my face that seemed to indicate sexual satisfaction. TRY TO LIVE THAT DOWN!!
Bailey :eek: |
|
| |
|
Joined:
September 2003
Posts: 782
Location: Waurika OK | It is obvious that all the important scientific work that once was done in Alamogordo, Sandia Lab, White Sands, Roswell, and Area 51, has been consolidated and confined (that may be the operative word here) to Las Cruces.
The work is done by an organization known as:
S.O.C.K.S.
S. lightly
O. vation
C. razed
K. aman
S. ociety
noel |
|
| |
|
Joined:
January 2004
Posts: 648
Location: Florida | Wahtever y'all be drinkin'... I'll take a double, straight up if you please. |
|
| |
|
Joined:
April 2003
Posts: 2503
Location: Fayetteville, NC | Ditto!! :D |
|
| |
|
Joined:
June 2002
Posts: 1614
Location: Converse, Texas | Interesting thing.. As I've said in previous threads, I learned guitar on a Harmony Monterey and a Rebel. FUnny thing is ... when I went to "real" guitars, I just can't remember what I did with them. I know I didn't throw them away. ANd the Monterey was a finger-buster. Hmmmmmmmmm... :confused: |
|
| |
|
Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 1380
Location: Central Oregon | I have a good friend that used to live here in Oregon. He worked as a tree faller in the woods until his job was squelched by the tree huggers, then he got a contract & moved to New Mexico to cut down radioactive trees for the gummint for a "tree"mendous amount of money.
Last time he came to visit he said it was too hot to work during the day down there so they cut the trees at night, which is fairly easy since the radioactive trees glow in the dark. Of course the locals make a fortune selling dark glasses to them to keep them from getting night blindness from the glowing trees.
He figures he will be making twice as much money by next year when the extra set of arms that are growing out of his back from the radioactivity finish developing & he will be able to run two chain saws at once.
/\/\/ |
|
| |
|
Joined:
December 2003
Posts: 13997
Location: Upper Left USA | So Nils, the friendly fella was a Faller, for real? Sounds like he accepted his windfall with open arms(s)! A fortunate faller fellow for sure! I have been working around Reactors for years and aside from myself and friends having only daughters the risk is small!
As for Tree Huggers - If you can really hug the tree, as in arms all the way around - the tree should be left standing. Let it grow another 20 years so it will make a good guitar top.
As for the original topic! We tend to broadcast our new aquisitions but our losses and leftovers just quietly slip away. Deaths and dumb mistakes probably take their tolls. |
|
| |
|
Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 1380
Location: Central Oregon | Now there's an atomic benefit I never knew about, all girls you say? Swell! I'm in favor of more girls! :) Being happily married is like being on a diet- when you go into a fancy restaurant you know you can't eat, but it don't hurt to look at the menu!
/\/\/ |
|
| |
|
Joined:
May 2002
Posts: 3005
Location: Las Cruces, NM | I'm still here and I saved my ass, I told my wife I had just returned from Connecticut where I had sponsored a rally protesting the mistreatment of small animals by TV advertisers e.g. the Taco Bell Chihuahua, and all the ladies had ripped off their underwear and thrown it on me.
She said why don't you show me the sort of people you spend your time with at night trying to improve the world, and I showed her a few posts on this board.
DOES ANYBODY KNOW A GOOD LAWYER? |
|
| |
|
Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 1380
Location: Central Oregon | "DOES ANYBODY KNOW A GOOD LAWYER?"
"Good" lawyer? Please define "good".
/\/\/ |
|
| |
|
Joined:
December 2003
Posts: 13997
Location: Upper Left USA | Good Lawyer
Jumbo Shrimp
Government Intelligence
Enough Guitars
Long Vacation
Get the picture? |
|
| |
|
Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 14842
Location: NJ | I have a favorite recipe for "Good Lawyer".
The key is to slice them thin enough . . . and don't leave 'em on the grille too long. |
|
| |
|
Joined:
May 2004
Posts: 2850
Location: Midland, MI | Originally posted by MWoody:
Good Lawyer
Jumbo Shrimp
Government Intelligence
Enough Guitars
Long Vacation
Get the picture?
I'll take a stab:
You're getting a divorce, then moving yourself and your massive collection of Ovation's to Louisianna bayou country to enjoy fresh seafood and avoid the TLA-that-shall-not-be-named-but-is-responsible-for-GAS. You've finally broken out of your programming, only to realize that you don't need that redwood collector's someone just posted, but instead require some R&R?
Was I close? What do I win?
:cool: |
|
| |
|
Joined:
December 2003
Posts: 13997
Location: Upper Left USA | These are Oxymorons. Not to be confused with Oxycontin although both can be mind numbing.
:) :o :o |
|
| |
|
Joined:
May 2004
Posts: 2850
Location: Midland, MI | Originally posted by MWoody:
These are Oxymorons. Not to be confused with Oxycontin although both can be mind numbing.
:) :o :o
I knew that....I think.
:eek: |
|
| |
|
Joined:
November 2002
Posts: 3666
Location: Pacific Northwest Inland Empire | Cruster, and an extra baggage compartment, from what I've heard about that stuff. |
|
| |
|
Joined:
January 2002
Posts: 14127
Location: 6 String Ranch | Is there such a thing as a good lawyer?
Yes, when he's your lawyer and not the other side's. (he'll probably still charge too much) |
|
| |
|
Joined:
May 2004
Posts: 2850
Location: Midland, MI | Originally posted by seesquare:
Cruster, and an extra baggage compartment, from what I've heard about that stuff.
Not sure I follow. Hrmm.
If you meant the Remeron, the only side effects I've heard about (and this is second hand, so who knows what else there is) are intense sleepyness (the person I know will sleep 16+ hours at a shot), thirst and something else that escapes my memory, but it was weird. Oh, loss of feeling (like, tactile sense). |
|
| |
|
Joined:
November 2002
Posts: 3666
Location: Pacific Northwest Inland Empire | Cruster, like-50#-in-60-days-type side-effects. Plays havoc with your metabolism. Ask Mr. Wong. |
|
| |
|
Joined:
May 2004
Posts: 2850
Location: Midland, MI | Originally posted by seesquare:
Cruster, like-50#-in-60-days-type side-effects. Plays havoc with your metabolism. Ask Mr. Wong.
Holy fiznuckle! Hadn't seen that one. Then again, I don't see the friend who's on it very frequently. Feh, that's nasty. Not sure who Mr. Wong is, though...
I prefer to self-medicate with Bombay Sapphire and a hint of lime juice. Or GeniusBeer(tm). :) |
|
| |
|
Joined:
May 2002
Posts: 3005
Location: Las Cruces, NM | Anybody here know the words to "Snow Blind", they seem appropriate? |
|
| |
|
Joined:
December 2001
Posts: 10583
Location: NJ | Snow Blind -black sabbath
What you get and what you see
Things that don’t come easily
Feeling happy in my vein
Icicles within my brain
(cocain)
Something blowing in my head
Winter’s ice, it soon will spread
Death would freeze my very soul
Makes me happy, makes me cold
My eyes are blind but I can see
The snowflakes glisten on the tree
The sun no longer sets me free
I feel there’s no place freezing me
Let the winter sun shine on
Let me feel the frost of dawn
Fill my dreams with flakes of snow
Soon I’ll feel the chilling glow
Don’t you think I know what I’m doing
Don’t tell me that it’s doing me wrong
You’re the one who’s really a loser
This is where I feel I belong
Crystal world with winter flowers
Turns my day to frozen hours
Lying snowblind in the sun
Will my ice age ever come? |
|
| |
|
Joined:
July 2002
Posts: 327
Location: Houston, TX | Not sure, but I always thought the last line of 3rd stanza was "I feel the snowflakes freezing me". Anyway, didn't expect that reference to pop up - hadn't thought about that song in years. |
|
| |
Where do they go?
