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Forums Archive -> The Vault: 2006 | Message format |
schroeder![]() |
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Joined: November 2004 Posts: 4413 | At least you'll score points for letting your wife see this..... 15 PIECES OF ADVICE TO BE PASSED ON TO YOUR MUM, YOUR DAUGHTERS OR >>GRANDDAUGHTERS, NIECES, AUNTS, GIRLFRIENDS, ETC. >> >> >>1. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers. >> >>2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door. >> >>3. If they put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all up >>there. >> >>4. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone. >> >>5. Go for the younger man. You might as well, they never mature anyway. >> >>6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can >>tell them apart. >> >>7. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make >>some woman miserable. >! ;> >>8. Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself >>types. >> >>9. Best way to get a man to do something is to suggest he is too old for >>it. >> >>10. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. >> >>11. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital. >> >>12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even >>in Biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions. >> >>13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him cheque >>books. >> >>14. Remember a sense of humour does not mean that you tell him jokes, it >>means that you laugh at his. >> >>15. Sadly, all men are created equal. | ||
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xnoel![]() |
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Joined: September 2003 Posts: 782 Location: Waurika OK | You just gave my wife a good laugh to start her day. | ||
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an4340![]() |
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Joined: May 2003 Posts: 4389 Location: Capital District, NY, USA Minor Outlying Islands | And here's a tidbit for boys: All cats are gray in the dark. | ||
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MWoody![]() |
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Joined: December 2003 Posts: 13996 Location: Upper Left USA | ...and they taste like chicken! | ||
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TommyK![]() |
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Joined: January 2006 Posts: 208 Location: Illinois | Some of the adivce is spot on. Most sound a bit chauvanistic to me. :( But that's our lot in life: take verbal and physical abuse from the wimmen folk. Why? Because that's the way our daddies raised us, never to hit girls. I think Tom T. Hall said it best, " CHORUS G C D7 G It's faster horses -- younger women -- older whiskey -- more money!" | ||
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BrianT![]() |
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Joined: January 2004 Posts: 338 Location: SE Michigan | Dear Lord......I'm a Man.......But I can change......If I have to. (the Man's prayer - Red Green) | ||
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MWoody![]() |
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Joined: December 2003 Posts: 13996 Location: Upper Left USA | "If they can't find you handsome, they should find you handy." R/G | ||
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Brian T![]() |
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Joined: May 2003 Posts: 425 Location: SE Michigan | And remember....keep yer stick on the ice | ||
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Jeff W.![]() |
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Joined: November 2003 Posts: 11039 Location: Earth·SolarSystem·LocalInterstellarCloud·Local Bub | How many men does it take to change a light bulb?? F@¢K the B!cthes, Let 'em cook in the dark! (PM me for personal apologies) | ||
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Tupperware![]() |
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Joined: January 2005 Posts: 4903 Location: Phoenix AZ | This is a true story. About 1985 I bought my mom a microwave oven with the touchpad digital control. Her previous one had the rotary dial and that greasy probe you stick up the chickens ass. Anyway, I can over to her house and she was all frustrated from trying to use the microwave touchpad/display to balance her checkbook. Dave | ||
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moody, p.i.![]() |
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Joined: March 2002 Posts: 15678 Location: SoCal | Hey Whitehead, you ever wonder why you're single? | ||
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Waskel![]() |
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Joined: February 2005 Posts: 11840 Location: closely held secret | Originally posted by BrianT: Sorry to correct you, Brian, but I believe it's: Dear Lord......I'm a Man.......But I can change......If I have to. (the Man's prayer - Red Green) "I'm a man, but I can change... if I have to... I guess... | ||
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stephent28![]() |
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![]() Joined: April 2004 Posts: 13303 Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066 | Originally posted by moody, p.i.: I think it's cause he so f&&king brilliant!Hey Whitehead, you ever wonder why you're single? | ||
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Beal![]() |
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Joined: January 2002 Posts: 14127 Location: 6 String Ranch | If a man is alone on the moon, is he still wrong? | ||
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Weaser P![]() |
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Joined: October 2005 Posts: 5331 Location: Cicero, NY | Originally posted by cwk2: Depends on if he had enough gas to get further away from his mother in law...If a man is alone on the moon, is he still wrong? | ||
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Mark in Boise![]() |
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Joined: March 2005 Posts: 12759 Location: Boise, Idaho | Originally posted by cwk2: Don't know, but we sure know he didn't ask for directions on how to get there.If a man is alone on the moon, is he still wrong? | ||
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Jeff W.![]() |
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Joined: November 2003 Posts: 11039 Location: Earth·SolarSystem·LocalInterstellarCloud·Local Bub | Originally posted by moody, p.i.: Never for a moment.Hey Whitehead, you ever wonder why you're single? | ||
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