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Location: Capital District, NY, USA Minor Outlying Islands | So this guy goes into the brain store and says, I need some brains for a musician.
So the clerk behind the counter says, well your in luck, I got guitar player brains for $1 a piece, and I got banjo player brains for $100 a piece.
The guy says, gee, that's some difference, why are the banjo player brains so expensive.
Oh, says the clerk, they've never been used! |
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Location: Brighty in Blighty | But surely used brains would be better, the more you use your brain the 'better' it gets.
Didn't Albert Einsten say "if you don't use it you lose it". |
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Posts: 715
| An, this joke reminded me of something that my SIL told me a few years ago.
It seems that she took my now 11 year old nephew to the local music store. I think my nephew was probably around 7 at the time.
He saw some banjos on the wall and then said in a LOUD voice: "Mom, when did the hillbilies become extinct?" My SIL laughed, but she was also embarrassed.
Michelle |
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Location: 6 String Ranch | they're not extinct, they're alive and well in North Carolina. |
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Location: East Tennessee | There's a few in Tennessee also. |
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Posts: 14127
Location: 6 String Ranch | So, this hillbilly was doing his sister
She starts laughing at him.
He stops and asks what's so funny?
She said, "You do it just like daddy"
He says, "Yeah, I know."
Mom told me. |
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Posts: 15680
Location: SoCal | What has six legs and three teeth?
The front row at a banjo clinic.
Did you hear about the banjo player that was so out of tune the other banjo players started to notice?
What do you say to a banjo player in a three piece suit?
Will the defendant please rise.
What's the difference between a Cockatoo and a Banjo?
One is loud, garish and obnoxious, the other is a bird.
What is the definition of perfect pitch?
When one lands a banjo into a garbage can at 50 feet..
What is the difference between a banjo and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off before you jump on a trampoline.
How can you tell if the stage is level?
The banjo player is drooling out of both sides of his mouth.
Did you know that the toothbrush was invented by a banjo player?
That's right, otherwise is would have been called a teethbrush.
Why are banjo's ugly?
So deaf people can hate em, too.
FOR SALE. 1930's vintage banjo. Excellent condition. RECENTLY TUNED.
What's the difference between a banjo and chain saw?
You can tune a chain saw and it has dynamic range.
My wife just told me to choose between HER or my BANJO.
Jeeze I'll miss her.
What do you call a guy who hangs out with musicians?
A banjo player.
How is a banjo like a bomb?
By the time you hear it, it's too late.
What's the difference between a banjo and an onion?
You cry when you cut up an onion.
If you drop a banjo and an accordian off the Empire State Building at the same time, which one lands first?
Who cares?
What's the difference between rock 'n roll and bluegrass?
Rockers play all night without tuning; bluegrass pickers tune all night without playing.
How do you get a banjo picker off of your porch?
Pay for the Pizza.
What's the difference between a banjo player and large pepperoni pizza?
A pizza can feed a family of four.
How many banjo players does it take to change a light bulb?
Three, one to change the bulb and two to argue over whether Earl would have changed it that way. |
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Location: Hot Springs, S.D. | I thought the reason banjo brains were so expensive was because they're so rare. |
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Posts: 15680
Location: SoCal | Originally posted by CanterburyStrings:
I thought the reason banjo brains were so expensive was because they're so rare. +1 |
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Location: closely held secret | I'm tellin' Steve...
... on second thought, I think he's heard all those. |
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Location: Yucaipa, California | ... I think my "hat" just popped. |
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Location: 6 String Ranch | The reason banjo songs have names is so you can tell the difference between them.
And yes, Steve's heard all of these.
And what do you call an optimist?
A banjo player with a beeper. |
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Posts: 11840
Location: closely held secret | Originally posted by Beal:
And yes, Steve's heard all of these.
Figured as much. He probably heard them from you... |
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Posts: 14127
Location: 6 String Ranch | He told me most of them....... |
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Posts: 8307
Location: Tennessee | A banjo player ran into a store for a quick errand on his way to a session, leaving his banjo in plain sight in the car. When he came out of the store, he saw to his horror that a window had been smashed out and one door was open. He ran and checked in his car and sure enough, some bastard left 5 more banjos in the back seat. |
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Posts: 4833
Location: Campbell River, British Columbia | ...missed one....
What's the difference between between Bagpipes and Banjos?
Well. yer Banjo burns hotter, while yer bagpipes, they burn longer. |
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Location: Pacific Northwest Inland Empire | The best sound a banjo makes is when its hit by the accordian in the dumpster. |
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Location: East Tennessee | Q. What is the best thing to clean the strings on a Banjo?
A. Wire cutters. :D |
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Posts: 1445
Location: Nova Scotia, Canada | The late Hank Snow once said "I hate banjers and those that plays 'em!" |
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Banjo player joke.