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Location: Keepin' It Weird in Portland, OR | Okay, so I took the 1612 Beater out today even thought the weather is nice...
I play near an office building, near a bus stop, and outdoor tables with people (sometimes).
People are cordial... They give me money and actually Thank Me for playing.
People listen while eating or waiting for the bus.
I don't usually attract a crowd.... Until Today.
Apparently a high school class was on a Field Trip.
I was doing Hotel California when about 30+ teenage kids appear, and crowd around me.
So I finish Hotel California, and they applaud, toss change, but they won't go away!
So I sat on my amp and played "Wish You Were Here"... And they applauded.
Then I played something else (that I cannot seem to remember at this moment) and got more applause.
Then they finally went and caught their bus.
Maybe I play better than I think that I do...
Maybe they were being polite to the old guy...
They seemed to enjoy it.
I was terribly uncomfortable!
I have no problem playing with witnesses, and forcing people to listen to me butcher Neil Young. (I don't sing)
But I was looking at Dozens of expectant faces...
And they were Expecting ME to Produce something that sounded like music.
And I had NO preparation or warning... They were just THERE and expecting me to play something!
Well, I survived. They applauded, gave me change, and even Thanked me as they left! :eek: :cool:
Okay, that's my story... What's Yours? |
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Location: Boise, Idaho | Arthur, you have more nerve than I do. My last "gig" was for my parents' 60th Anniversary. The crowd would be easy to please, ranging from 4 to 84, but mostly toward the 84 end. The first song was with 2 of my brothers, one of whom had been in a band for years, but got the guitar out after 20 years just for this. The other had been playing and singing in church all his life. I screwed up the intro on that song, by starting on the wrong fret, but the other 2 guitars drowned me out.
The second song was a solo by me and I was surprised that my voice quivered. I was so worried about the guitar stuff, but got nervous over the singing.
We got good comments like when you going on tour and you can really sing high, which indicated the level of the audience. To have someone actually paying attention would make me way too nervous. |
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Location: Caribou, ME | I've never played for a crowd. Ever. I am absolutely petrified of the thought of anyone hearing me.
Back in '86 I got coerced into playing lead in a band that was forming. I kicked and screamed a lot in the days before our first practice. Since it was 'just us' jamming, I loosened up after a while but we lost our drummer after a month or two (job transfer) before we actually ever played out. I practiced and practiced and copied solos from the records as best I could and delivered them. Regurgitated might be a better word. I can actually pinpoint my one shining moment with that 'sorta' band. Normally I used my Tele and my Hopf Saturn 63 (with Fender Twin, Boss CE-2 Chorus and ProCo Rat distortion) but one day I brought a completely beat to crap '70 Les Paul cherry sunburst with three Dimarzios. I cranked the Twin and ripped through an extended and completely improvised solo to Marshall Tucker 'Can't you See'. I went into a sort of trance and stuff came out of the amp that I didn't believe was caused by my hands.
After the band plans fell apart I never bothered pursuing it again. A friend asked me to play bass with his band and I rehearsed with them once.
Once.
I was so spooked I couldn't even find the changes on the bass, or remember them for that matter. I was horrible beyond horrible.
So aside from that one brief experience, I can't bring myself to play around people. I try to kid myself into believing that I just play for my own enjoyment but that's a major copout. It's just an excuse.
I'd commit many unspeakable crimes if I could be in a surf band. I'd crank the reverb up to 10 and break the knob off. Or I'd die happy if I was chunking rhythm on an old Gibson L-50 in a Squirrel Nut Zipper oddball eclectic band. But I'm in northern Maine, no diversity in music at ALL, I'm still frozen stiff at the thought of someone hearing me, and I'm 50 years old and an absolute failure at music.
How's that for a taxicab confession OMA?
Brother you don't know how blessed you are. |
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Location: Newington, CT | Great story, OMA!
My last stage fright incident was at a private party where I was supposed to play something fast and Spanish. No problem. I can do that, but I wasn't prepared for the requests for an encore!
Since I make it all up as I go along, anyway, ye'd think I'd a'been just fine, but ye'd a'been wrong! Since I was planning to play only one song, I froze. I started something, and kinda mangled it, and ended it quickly.
Kinda too bad, 'cause the FIRST "song" was VERY well-received, and even had one o'those audience-performer interaction things going. I'd do a fast run, and they'd applaud, then I'd slow it down and do some soulful, and they'd applaud. Then, I'd do another fast run and they'd applaud. Finished on a really fast run that, in the middle of it, had me thinking for just a moment: "Uhhhhhhh...THIS is going well! I didn't know I could DO this! I CAN'T do this! I hope I don;t blow it!" One of those streams of thought that zing through your consciousness in a blink.
And I didn't! Blow it, that is. I stuck the ending! Nice! The whole "song" lasted about five minutes, generated a lotta applause and cheers, and I have to admit I was pretty jazzed up at the end.
Then I blew it. Lesson: leave well enough alone (or have an encore always at the ready!)!
*sigh* |
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Location: Budd Lake, NJ | I don't like singing vocal solos, as in "I'm-singing-all-by-myself-and-all-the-eyes-are-on-me" vocal solos.
Guitar in hand, leading a worship team and 80+ women in worship on retreat, piece of cake. NO nerves whatsoever.
But...ladies' trio, having to fill in one verse in the beginning of the song because one of the other women had this terrible froggy thing going on in her voice, I did just barely o.k. Thankfully, everything else I had to sing in the piece was with the two other voices, and that part of it sounded great. (This was three weeks ago......)
I guess I am just more comfortable in what Hollywood would call a "supporting actress" role--I am much happier making other people look good.
--Karen |
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Location: Connersville, Indiana | The first time I played at this camp ground I was nervous as hell. Our names were in lights along the highway, and while setting up I could see all the people gathering around with their chairs and blankets and beers. When It was my turn to play I played my song when skies turn grey. A song about a little girl afraid of storms and her relationship with her father. After I was done with the song there was loads of people clapping and one girl in the front row crying. I asked her why she was crying and she said the song reminded her of her dad, who just died of cancer. I noticed in looking at her that she more than likely had Downs syndrome. I felt awful and for a moment I did not know what to do. I then asked her if she liked Elvis. she started to laugh and smile and said yes. So I played Steamroller blues. After I came off stage she walked up to me and gave me a big hug and said thank you. That was one weird scary night. |
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Location: NJ | you have a problem when you are no longer nervous. |
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Location: Colorado Rocky Mountains | Al is correct. You need some adrenalin to stay right at the edge of your best. If you relax too much, things can unexpectedly happen. A little adrenalin will force you to stay focused. I've done hundreds of stage shows and the worst experience I ever had was in George M! I had the lead and the show starts off with a five minute monologue by George with the cast all standing upstage. This was about three weeks into the run and I had known the lines cold for several months. I walked up on stage and started the monologue as I had dozens of times before, very relaxed, and boom, two minutes into the lines, my mind wandered, I lost focus, then went blank. After an awkward pause, a cast member tossed me a word that got me back on track, but I learned my lesson. If you want to feel terror, just forget your lines when 900 people are staring at you. You can never totally relax and just expect things to happen by rote. The problem with a monologue is that you are totally on your own, which is probably very close to playing and singing solo. If you're interacting with another and have multiple lines, or playing in a band with others, you might be able to fake your way out of it if you get in trouble. I have also switched middle verses from time to time on stage, which isn't a huge problem if you're singing solo, although it doesn't make the conductor too happy. This is more problematic if you're singing with others. As Al suggests, you're always more likely to be at your best when there's a little butterfly flapping around your stomach. That's the adrenalin working for you.
Back in my childhood dancing days with CBS, I had the opportunity to meet Red Skelton. He was perpetually nervous about performing in front of a live audience (even just a small studio audience of maybe 300) and would often throw up just before going on stage, sometimes four or five times during the taping of a single show. Here was a lendendary performer who had been appearing on stage for maybe 60 years by that time, and he still was nervous. They had buckets on both sides of the studio stage just for this purpose. |
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Location: Connersville, Indiana | WOW, you met Red Skelton, a Hoosier, he is my favorite of all time. Thanks for sharing that I think I'll go put in a tape of one of his shows. :) |
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Location: Eaton, Indiana | 47 years playing... nearly 7000 logged concerts
still get nervous... never quit... still full of excitment!
scott lamperd b c (before computers) |
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Location: California | Good job Arthur.. you did good, next time you will be nervous. Everytime I feel in this way.
Hector |
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Location: USA | My first show I was very excited but also very nervous. My hands were shaking so bad they were bouncing off the fret board.
Our set started, I felt like i was going to pass out. I had a half stack at that show, found a milk crate and put it behind my stalk. I sat behind my amp and sang and played. It was funny. It was a crowd of 500 people at this show trying to figure out who was playing and singing but couldnt see anyone.
My two freinds, without me knowing, came behind me and slid me out to the front of the stage on the milk crate. After that my stage fright was gone. They had to drag me off the stage after that to end the show. |
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Location: Miami | +1 on the "it never goes away" comments. |
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Location: Newington, CT | One quick side observation: GREAT topic...look at the plethora of long, thoughtful, substantive comments. Look at the dearth of snarky, wiseacre comments.
OMA: this one gets a 9 out of 10 for thought-provoking, snarkiness-/silliness-/pettiness-/sarcasm-suppressing topics.
Nice job! |
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Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066 | snark ye tarrier snark
I still get nervous until the first note is hit/strummed.
I also have a harder time playing/singing in front of friends/family versus strangers. |
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Location: closely held secret | Originally posted by stephent28:
I also have a harder time playing/singing in front of friends/family versus strangers. That's because there's a sightly higher chance that friends/family will be listening/caring... |
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Location: Boise, Idaho | Originally posted by Waskel:
Originally posted by stephent28:
I also have a harder time playing/singing in front of friends/family versus strangers. That's because there's a sightly higher chance that friends/family will be listening/caring... |
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Location: Flahdaw | Originally posted by stephent28:
I also have a harder time playing/singing in front of friends/family versus strangers. Man, is that ever true. I can play in front of strangers all day long, but I go nuts in front of friends and family. Why? Who knows? |
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Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066 | I think part of it is false sincerity.
Your family will say you sound great regardless of how you think you sound.
If a stranger comes up and says something positive it is much more believable. If they criticize.....Phuck 'em....what do they know! |
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Location: Michigan | A little adrenelin is good. Too much is not. Confidence cannot be underestimated, especially when tempered with a touch of humility. A DEEP breath slowing exhaled can be just the ticket before beginning in front of a new audience. MOST people are cordial - even if you are not an accomplished muscian. It is the very few who may have had a bit too much "x" that can be difficult and only experience can teach you that one.
Remember - the WORST that can happen is you will learn something - and THAT is a wonderful thing.
Embrace every opportunity. |
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Location: San Bernardino, California | The first time I played out (mid '60s), I was so nervious that I played the intro to 'Paint it Black' at about twice the tempo and BACKWARDS. |
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Location: The Great Pacific Northwest | I was hoping I wasn't the only one, but maybe no one else has figured out how to put it into words. Not sure I have either, but I will try.
Nervous, yes. "Stage Fright" as in a "fear that affects a person about to face an audience" no.
I get nervous about cables working, amps working, sound working, monitors working etc.. The audience is kindof not relevant to me.
If it's a paying gig, I'm glad they are there. I'm glad if they like the show. If they don't... well, not much I can do about it.... I didn't hire me. I didn't pay for the tickets. I was paid to do what I do, and I'll try to do the best I can cause I want to do it more in the future.
If I'm not getting paid, there's even less pressure. I can do what I want to do, and again.. if the audience likes it, that's really cool. If not... well.. not much I can do about that.
And speaking of the audience liking it or not... While I've never gotten booed, I've gotten applause and compliments from people that obviously were drunk, or listening to someone else in their head, or just trying to be kind. I know when I'm on, and I know when I'm not. Doesn't everyone?? Other people's opinion doesn't really matter to me, it's their opinion.
For the times when I felt on, and the audience seemed to think so too. That's obviously an easier night than when your're getting paid to try to coax a good time out of people, you can't hear yourself, there's technical issues and you're trying to be entertaining at the same time. Frustration yes... fear no. |
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Location: Colorado | I've played only a couple of times in front of an audience larger than 4 or 5. Both times were when I was in elementary school for recitals with numerous musicians/vocalists, so I was only really visible to my parents. I was nervous both times.
Back in my single days, I used to sing quite a bit with a couple of friends of mine. I decided to sing for my wife (she had no clue this was coming) at our wedding reception in front of 100 people I knew--that bordered on stagefright. I rehearsed the song for a couple of weeks and didn't know if I would make it through the song without forgetting words or getting too emotional. I did make it through, but nearly stumbled on the second verse.
I just wish I could play my guitar and sing at the same time. I've tried--can't do it. |
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Location: Michigan | Can't think of many things better that playing and singing in front of an appreciative audience.
Just to put this correctly in perspective - it has been nearly 15 years since I played my geeter. I am in a blissful place at the moment and just took my first lesson today in nearly 45 years. Pretty d*** cool. Can't wait to start pulling out the old ballads and the myriad of songs I wrote years ago. A performance is certainly in the works - but likely a few nmonths (minimum) away.
There is nothing like an appreciative audience. |
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Location: Newington, CT | "I am in a blissful place at the moment"
Hey, Flash! Great to hear! May your bliss continue many decades hence! Best to you!
Alan |
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Location: The Great Pacific Northwest | Originally posted by Flash1717Legend:
Can't think of many things better that playing and singing in front of an appreciative audience.
Just to put this correctly in perspective - it has been nearly 15 years since I played my geeter. I am in a blissful place at the moment and just took my first lesson today in nearly 45 years. Pretty d*** cool. Can't wait to start pulling out the old ballads and the myriad of songs I wrote years ago. A performance is certainly in the works - but likely a few nmonths (minimum) away.
There is nothing like an appreciative audience. + 1 |
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Location: Flahdaw | Very cool, Flash (although I have to wonder....what possessed you to stop playing for 15 years???!!)
I was thinking about playing in front of an audience or family, which is tougher, and I realized that I've been married for 29 years and my in-laws have never heard me play. Weird?? |
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Location: south east Michigan | Not really... I'm in the same boat.
With one group of friends breaking out a guitar is as natural as having a beer.
Then there is another group of friends who would consider it down right rude. |
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| I've only done two open mikes and each time I totally screwed up everything. I literally could not remember what chord I was supposed to play next.
I haven't done one in well over a year and just the thought of doing another one scares me.
Michelle |
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Location: south east Michigan | Don't
Give
Up
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.
We've all had our train wrecks.
Practice two songs until you are totally sick of them and get back on that horse. |
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Location: Michigan | Originally posted by dark bar:
Very cool, Flash (although I have to wonder....what possessed you to stop playing for 15 years???!!) No intention of a hi-jack...but to answer the Q - can't say for sure. Just no time I guess. Other interests popped up. Anyway...the recent catalyst was my 14 yeard old nephew (product of a messy divorce) and wanting to learn guitar. He's taking some lessons and sure enough asked my input on a couple of things. We got him a used Laney GC30 amp at a local pawn, picked up a distortion pedal and in helping him - got the old spark back. Been immersed every day now for about 3 weeks. The callouses are returning and I've landed a local instructor who was with Grand Funk between '96-'99. Always wanted a semi-hollow and decided on a Hagstrom.
Bottom line is it seems like I can breathe again - if that makes sense to anyone out there. I had forgotten how nice my Legend was for playing accoustic unplugged.
Thanks for asking. |
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Location: Nashville TN. | Old Man Arthur
Luv the story
Kids know classic rock
You must have done it well |
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| Originally posted by Slipkid:
Don't
Give
Up
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We've all had our train wrecks.
Practice two songs until you are totally sick of them and get back on that horse. Sometimes I have a rather blah feeling about doing another open mike. I actually haven't been to one just to listen in a long time.
I got to get restarted in doing one, but I've been lazy and in a rut lately. Maybe doing one might get me out of a rut again, who knows.
Michelle |
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Location: Flahdaw | One thing I've noticed with the open mics I've been to....
Unless it's an indie-style coffee house, you lose the audience's interest with original music or offbeat tunes. It seems the more recognizable the tune you are playing, the more the audience listens. When it's clear that you have lost the audience, I'm guessing stage fright would really increase dramatically. Nothing like looking out from the stage and no one is listening.
Michelle...get back up there with 3 songs that you KNOW everyone knows and likes, and play your fingers off. You might try some "chick" songs. I played with a girl who did cool versions of "Someone to lay down beside me" and "Your so vain"...might work for you. |
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| Originally posted by dark bar:
One thing I've noticed with the open mics I've been to....
Unless it's an indie-style coffee house, you lose the audience's interest with original music or offbeat tunes. It seems the more recognizable the tune you are playing, the more the audience listens. When it's clear that you have lost the audience, I'm guessing stage fright would really increase dramatically. Nothing like looking out from the stage and no one is listening.
Michelle...get back up there with 3 songs that you KNOW everyone knows and likes, and play your fingers off. You might try some "chick" songs. I played with a girl who did cool versions of "Someone to lay down beside me" and "Your so vain"...might work for you. Yes, I've been to open mikes where someone had done all originals and it is boring. Most of it is that angst ridden I hate you stuff. However, some mix in originals and covers and it makes it more interesting.
The cool thing about downloading and printing the jam books is that I've rediscovered some songs and have actually "tried my hand" at them. I'm working on "Bad Moon Rising". I've also been working on some stuff from Jesus Christ Superstar and "Father and Son" by Cat Stevens.
Michelle |
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| Maybe you're trying to do songs that are a little beyond your ability right now? You only recently picked up the guitar again, so maybe Croce and similar might be a bit beyond your current skill level. Keep practicing those types of songs to make yourself improve, but go through the songbooks and find some simple 3-chord tunes you like (Credence is a good start) and learn a few of those solidly to play at an open mic. That'll give you the confidence to try something a little more complex later.
Or do as I do - pick a genre and/or songs that don't matter if you're a bit sloppy ;) |
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Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066 | yeah, G8r but your sloppiness only lasts for a couple hours before you have the damn song mastered.
I should be so lucky! |
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| Originally posted by G8r:
Maybe you're trying to do songs that are a little beyond your ability right now? You only recently picked up the guitar again, so maybe Croce and similar might be a bit beyond your current skill level. Keep practicing those types of songs to make yourself improve, but go through the songbooks and find some simple 3-chord tunes you like (Credence is a good start) and learn a few of those solidly to play at an open mic. That'll give you the confidence to try something a little more complex later.
Or do as I do - pick a genre and/or songs that don't matter if you're a bit sloppy ;) Well, I've been doing this for over three years and have picked up the fingerpicking part of "The Last Supper" pretty well. It was just hard to play and sing it at the same time, but that too is coming along nicely.
At three years, I don't really know what should be beyond my ability, but I keep trying stuff and pushing myself.
The one thing I haven't been able to do is to pick a tune out by ear. I have to be shown what chord are being played in a song. Some people have the ability to pick them out, but I don't. I can hear when they change chords, but that is it.
One thing that is happening to me is that no matter how much I practice a song, I still sometimes can't remember which chord is to come next. I have to look at a sheet because the memory ain't working so good.
Michelle |
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Location: Boise, Idaho | At 3 years I was still learning Stairway to Heaven and chased out a dozen roommates. I learned some 3 chord songs and played one in a bar, but couldn't remember the last verse. That was it for being on stage except for a couple weddings. Got the verses mixed up on Wedding Song at one of those, too. I seem to have more problems with remembering the verses, or which one I'm on, than remembering the guitar part.
Michelle, learn a few 3 chord strumming songs like the Eagles or America's Sister Goldenhair or Lonely People. Those should be easy confidence boosters. For Croce, get the Pete Huttlinger dvds. |
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| Hi Mark:
I have a Pete Huttlinger Jim Croce DVD, but I haven't looked at it recently. I guess I was scared off by the fingerpicking stuff on it at the time.
Michelle |
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Location: Flahdaw | I know people who have played for 20 years that don't finger pick well (but may be great strummers or flat pickers)
Personally, at this stage I wouldn't even think about picking when there are 10 billion strumming songs you could work on. Being on stage is nerve wracking enough without worrying about finger control. Plus, singing and finger picking at the same time is doubly tough on your nerves. |
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| Originally posted by dark bar:
I know people who have played for 20 years that don't finger pick well (but may be great strummers or flat pickers)
Personally, at this stage I wouldn't even think about picking when there are 10 billion strumming songs you could work on. Being on stage is nerve wracking enough without worrying about finger control. Plus, singing and finger picking at the same time is doubly tough on your nerves. Weaser and AlanM will get a chance to hear how bad I am on Saturday! :D ;)
Actually, I am practicing a little of both, fingerpicking songs and strumming songs just so that I don't go crazy.
Michelle |
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Location: Michigan | Regarding the stage fright postings...
I recall my most nervous was singing for my sisters wedding. She had selected some songs which were a good stretch for my chord changing skills plus outside my normal vocal range. Being the only instrument and voice, if there was any mess up, it was going to be front an center. I practiced them diligently for several months before hand. And yes I did loose a few notes on vocals, and yes I likely was off beat a time or two, and yes there was both family and unknowns in the church, but if my sister was ever disapointed - she never said so.
I did sing play/sing from the balcony instead of right at the alter which at least gave me a bit of "cover". I also learned that day to loosen your tie before beginning to sing (although it was too,late when I figured that one out). Restricting your neck muscles is not optimum for extending an already limited range.
But it was still a good gig. Lots of positive comments afterwards - even if many were from well meaning relatives. It really does help if you actually believe you can play/sing. It also helps if you like being on stage.
For someone who does not enjoy an audience, I think it would be very difficult to learn that. I think there has to be "something" initially that would encourage a person to "want to share". For me, it is adrenilin, the angst of butterflies before, the smiles and applause of during and the emotional release after. Of course - bad days are bad. But like my vocal imperfections during my sisters wedding, at least I learned next time to loosen my tie ;-) |
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Location: Flahdaw | I played at a wedding years ago and did fine cos I was too stupid to be nervous. NOW I'd be a nervous wreck cos that's such a super important affair, that the couple will remember forever and is usually recorded for posterity. Screw it up and those people will never forgive you. Talk about the perfect setup for a train wreck! |
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Location: USA | I dont get nervous I get excited...once i get there I am ready to go...and I hate waiting...
Some venues what i will do is walk around before a gig a start scoping out the crowd, say hello, do a little mingling.
I always take the adage that I am just playing for friends... |
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Location: Boise, Idaho | The wedding singer stories reminded me of another one of my worst moments. It was the one where I got lost in the verses of the Wedding Song. Maybe it was the fact that I did most of my practicing on the Matrix in a Ford Fiesta while my wife drove from Idaho to Kansas. Fortunately, it was before everyone had video cameras, or my father-in-law (my wife's sister's wedding) would have had the camera in my face. I was supposed to turn on his tape recorder he had set up, but I forgot. Someone kindly had a stool for me to sit on, but my leg started twitching from having my foot up on the rung. It was bouncing so badly the guitar was shaking. The bride, and probably everyone else, noticed and commented that it looked like I was trying to keep time to a much faster song.
I should probably just stick to strumming songs at weddings, but "Lyin' Eyes" probably wouldn't go over too well. Anyway, my sister-in-law has been divorced twice, so no one ever talks about that wedding anymore. |
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Joined:
February 2008
Posts: 747
| Originally posted by dark bar:
..I was too stupid to be nervous. That is probably a prerequisite for success in the music industry. |
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Joined:
October 2007
Posts: 283
Location: Portland, OR | In college, used to grease the jitters with a few belts. Left that in the dust when started playing church music (somehow didn't seem right). Still get nervous. Am more confident with the vocals and it carries over. I had heard that story about Red Skelton and he was great. Laughed louder than anyone at his own jokes.
Once you get started the jitters go away. You can still be embarrassed, but that's another subject. |
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Joined:
April 2004
Posts: 13303
Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066 | Originally posted by sligoman:
In college, used to grease the jitters with a few belts. Left that in the dust when started playing church music (somehow didn't seem right). would seem like the time to break out the wine! |
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Joined:
January 2006
Posts: 1487
Location: Michigan | do you think these guys were embarressed ??
i don't think so
they kept going on and finished the song and i bet they are a pretty tight band by now .
at least i hope they got better . GWB
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pw8sNoodIDk |
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