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Joined:
November 2004
Posts: 4413
| At least you'll score points for letting your wife see this.....
15 PIECES OF ADVICE TO BE PASSED ON TO YOUR MUM, YOUR DAUGHTERS OR
>>GRANDDAUGHTERS, NIECES, AUNTS, GIRLFRIENDS, ETC.
>>
>>
>>1. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.
>>
>>2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.
>>
>>3. If they put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all up
>>there.
>>
>>4. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone.
>>
>>5. Go for the younger man. You might as well, they never mature anyway.
>>
>>6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can
>>tell them apart.
>>
>>7. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make
>>some woman miserable.
>! ;>
>>8. Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself
>>types.
>>
>>9. Best way to get a man to do something is to suggest he is too old for
>>it.
>>
>>10. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
>>
>>11. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.
>>
>>12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even
>>in Biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.
>>
>>13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him cheque
>>books.
>>
>>14. Remember a sense of humour does not mean that you tell him jokes, it
>>means that you laugh at his.
>>
>>15. Sadly, all men are created equal. |
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September 2003
Posts: 782
Location: Waurika OK | You just gave my wife a good laugh to start her day. |
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May 2003
Posts: 4389
Location: Capital District, NY, USA Minor Outlying Islands | And here's a tidbit for boys:
All cats are gray in the dark. |
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December 2003
Posts: 13996
Location: Upper Left USA | ...and they taste like chicken! |
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January 2006
Posts: 208
Location: Illinois | Some of the adivce is spot on. Most sound a bit chauvanistic to me. :(
But that's our lot in life: take verbal and physical abuse from the wimmen folk. Why? Because that's the way our daddies raised us, never to hit girls.
I think Tom T. Hall said it best,
"
CHORUS
G C D7 G
It's faster horses -- younger women -- older whiskey -- more money!" |
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January 2004
Posts: 338
Location: SE Michigan | Dear Lord......I'm a Man.......But I can change......If I have to.
(the Man's prayer - Red Green) |
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December 2003
Posts: 13996
Location: Upper Left USA | "If they can't find you handsome, they should find you handy."
R/G |
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May 2003
Posts: 425
Location: SE Michigan | And remember....keep yer stick on the ice |
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November 2003
Posts: 11039
Location: Earth·SolarSystem·LocalInterstellarCloud·Local Bub | How many men does it take to change a light bulb??
F@¢K the B!cthes, Let 'em cook in the dark!
(PM me for personal apologies) |
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January 2005
Posts: 4903
Location: Phoenix AZ | This is a true story. About 1985 I bought my mom a microwave oven with the touchpad digital control. Her previous one had the rotary dial and that greasy probe you stick up the chickens ass. Anyway, I can over to her house and she was all frustrated from trying to use the microwave touchpad/display to balance her checkbook. Dave |
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March 2002
Posts: 15678
Location: SoCal | Hey Whitehead, you ever wonder why you're single? |
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Joined:
February 2005
Posts: 11840
Location: closely held secret | Originally posted by BrianT:
Dear Lord......I'm a Man.......But I can change......If I have to.
(the Man's prayer - Red Green) Sorry to correct you, Brian, but I believe it's:
"I'm a man, but I can change... if I have to... I guess... |
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Joined:
April 2004
Posts: 13303
Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066 | Originally posted by moody, p.i.:
Hey Whitehead, you ever wonder why you're single? I think it's cause he so f&&king brilliant! |
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January 2002
Posts: 14127
Location: 6 String Ranch | If a man is alone on the moon, is he still wrong? |
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October 2005
Posts: 5331
Location: Cicero, NY | Originally posted by cwk2:
If a man is alone on the moon, is he still wrong? Depends on if he had enough gas to get further away from his mother in law... |
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March 2005
Posts: 12759
Location: Boise, Idaho | Originally posted by cwk2:
If a man is alone on the moon, is he still wrong? Don't know, but we sure know he didn't ask for directions on how to get there. |
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Joined:
November 2003
Posts: 11039
Location: Earth·SolarSystem·LocalInterstellarCloud·Local Bub | Originally posted by moody, p.i.:
Hey Whitehead, you ever wonder why you're single? Never for a moment. |
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OT - Way too close to home