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Joined: March 2005 Posts: 2791
Location: Atlanta, GA. | I'd love to see the lyrics to some of these.
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15. If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You
14. If The Phone Don't Ring,You'll Know It's Me
13. How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?
12. I Liked You Better Before I Got To Know You So Well
11. I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Getting Better
10. I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dogfight 'Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win
9. I'll Marry You Tomorrow, But Let's Honeymoon Tonight
8. I'm So Miserable Without You It's Like You're Still Here
7. If I Had Shot You When I First Wanted To, I'd Be Out Of Prison Now
6. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, and I Sure Do Miss Him
5. She Got The Ring and I Got the Finger
4. You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly
3. Her Teeth Was Stained But Her Heart Were Pure
2. She's Looking Better After Every Beer
1. I Ain't Never Gone To Bed With an Ugly Woman, But I've Sure Woke Up With A Few |
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Joined: August 2006 Posts: 2804
Location: ranson,wva | sound like a old david allen coe record..lol..jason |
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Joined: April 2004 Posts: 13303
Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066 | Don't know much about lyrics but I have definately lived a few of those titles ;) |
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Joined: August 2005 Posts: 3736
Location: Sunshine State, Australia | While reading this list I was thinking of adding a witty title to the end. Until I got to number 6.
That's the line I was gonna add.
I agree with Steve. |
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Joined: June 2006 Posts: 659
Location: Hiram, Georgia | lol, just what I needed with my morning coffee!
Note to self: stay away from Collin's honky tonks! |
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Joined: September 2006 Posts: 10777
Location: Keepin' It Weird in Portland, OR | Yeah, ol' David Allen Coe had The Perfect Country Song...
I was drunk the day my Mom got outta Prison,
An' I went down to get her, in the rain...
But before I got to the station in my Pick-up Truck,
She got runned-over by a danged-ol' Train.
Or something like that...
Just some lyrics for the poor folks who may have missed that one. |
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Joined: March 2002 Posts: 15654
Location: SoCal | Steve Goodman and John Prine wrote that song.... |
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Joined: November 2005 Posts: 4820
Location: Campbell River, British Columbia | Jimmy Buffet wrote #14
Dan Hicks recorded
(& probably wrote) #13
The rest I don't know who/what.
But there's also
She Got The Goldmine, I Got The Shaft. |
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Joined: March 2002 Posts: 15654
Location: SoCal | There's also the Rodney Crowell tune
It's Hard to Kiss The Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Out All Day Long.... |
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Joined: April 2004 Posts: 13303
Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066 | A few more.............
Do You Love As Good As You Look?
Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye
Here's A Quarter, Call Someone Who Cares
I Changed Her Oil, She Changed My Life
I Fell In A Pile Of You And Got Love All Over Me
I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You
I'm Just A Bug On The Windshield Of Life
I've Been Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart
I've Got The Hungries For Your Love And I'm Waiting In Your Welfare Line
If Love Were Oil, I'd Be A Quart Low
If My Nose Were Full of Nickels, I'd Blow It All On You
If You Don't Leave Me Alone, I'll Go And Find Someone Else Who Will
If You Leave Me, Can I Come Too?
Mama Get The Hammer (There's A Fly On Papa's Head)
May The Bird Of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose
My John Deere Was Breaking Your Field, While Your Dear John Was Breaking My Heart
Oh, I've Got Hair Oil On My Ears And My Glasses Are slipping Down, But Baby I Can See Through You
She Got The Gold Mine And I Got The Shaft
She Made Toothpicks Out Of The Timber Of My Heart
She's Got Freckles On Her, But She's Pretty
Thank God And Greyhound (She's Gone)
They May Put Me In Prison, But They Can't Stop My Face From Breakin' Out
Velcro Arms, TEFLON(R) Heart
When You Leave Walk Out Backwards, So I'll Think You're Walking In
You Can't Have Your Kate And Edith Too
You Can't Roller Skate In A Buffalo Herd
You Were Only A Splinter In My Ass As I Slid Down The Bannister Of Life |
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Joined: November 2003 Posts: 11039
Location: Earth·SolarSystem·LocalInterstellarCloud·Local Bub | She's Got Freckles On Her Butt, Shes's Pretty... |
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